The length of the relationship often determines how long it will take you to move on after a breakup. Most of the time, though not always, the longer the relationship, the more memories and baggage you will have. Usually, this determines the length of time it will take for you to stop grieving. Hopefully, soon you'll want to meet someone new. If your partner cheated on you or did something worse, it will more often than not still take quite a bit of time for you to finally separate from them emotionally.
Even though we may wish we could at times, it's hard to just flip a switch and turn off all the good memories and emotional connections we had with this person for such a long time. You might need to edge away slowly, in baby steps, until finally you can stand on your own two feet again. One of the first steps in this process is to get away. Maybe not literally, but figuratively. Put away all the pictures and mementos the two of you collected during your time together. Don't call them or accept their call if they call you. You need time and space to sort out matters.
Everyone is different, for you it might be easier to have some friends come over and pack everything up all at once and put it in the attic. For others it may be easier to do it in small steps, a little each day until it's all out of sight. There is no wrong way, as long as it gets done. Even doing something like redecorating or painting may help you get the fresh perspective that will help you.
If you've been meaning to buy new furniture or paint the wall in the living room, now may be the perfect time. For one thing it will give you something to do, something positive that will keep your mind off the ex. Changing your surroundings will make it a little easier to forget and move on. I'm not saying that you should relocate but that is a viable possibility.
No one is suggesting that a coat of paint on the wall or a new couch will make all the pain go away, but it might give you something else to focus on and take away some of the things that will trigger the painful memories of the two of you watching movies or doing a sudoku puzzle on Sunday mornings. Those little memories of the seemingly unimportant times are the toughest to forget. The best relationship breakup advice I can give you is to keep moving forward with life. After a breakup, surround yourself with friends and family and hang in there, because this too shall pass.
Tweet